Yes I'm pregnant again. #5! After reading many birth stories online I was inspired to write mine.
When I was 19 I got pregnant with my first child. Being so young, I had no idea of my options and choices during childbirth. I went to the doctor my mom, step mom and sisters went to. I let everyone make my choices for me. When I was 20 years old, on the way to my younger sister's high school graduation, I went into labor while in rush hour traffic. I never took a child birthing class or anything like that. I knew nothing! I never remember my doctor even explaining anything to me.
I remember walking the halls trying to get labor to progress. I remember a VERY painful back labor. Labor started at about 4pm on a Friday and I had my son the next morning. I remember almost nothing about my labor. I do remember the intense pain. I remember being completely exhausted. Then I vaguely remember the doctor coming in telling me I he had to do an emergency c-section. People that were there say it was because the baby's heart stopped. I honestly have no idea what happened. I don't remember seeing my son for the first time or even holding him. I don't remember who was there. It was not at all what I thought child birth was suppose to be like.
Fast forward 2 years later I was pregnant again. Again I was young and still didn't know my options. And no one informed me either! I was never told I could choose a VBAC. I had no idea what that even was. So of course I did the only thing I knew, I went to the same doctor and had a repeat c-section. He never once informed me of any other option. In fact I remember exactly what he said "we will do another c-section since you've already had one". I had no reason to question him. So when I was 22 I had my second c-section.
Three years later it was time for another baby! By this time I was a bit more informed (only due to my own research). I ordered books and read up on having a VBAC. When I brought it up to my doctor (the same one) I was shot down. I was told it wasn't an option. So I believed him. And was talked out of it. I actually went into labor at 37 weeks with this one. And when I was 25 I had my third c-section.
And then another three years go by. It was time for baby #4. She was a complete surprise. I didn't even bother thinking about a VBAC. I didn't look into it at all. Which I do regret. And then when I was 28 I had my fourth c-section.
Now here I am at 31 (yes i actually just gave my real age) and I am faced with a 5th c-section. I have done tons of reading online about a VBAMC (vaginal delivery after multiple c-sections). I've also read a lot about the risks that come with having yet another c-section. So now I'm scared to do either! I wish the baby could just appear! Now I know that's not possible. So I have to make a decision. So far I have no one on my side for a VBAC. But then again I don't think they understand the risks of another c-section. I would LOVE to not have another c-section. This is our last and it may be selfish but I want the child birth experience. And I know if I don't try it then I will regret it. But if someone can show me that another c-section is the safest option without a doubt then that's obviously what I will choose. But from what I'm reading there are risks either way. And I understand that even if I try a VBAC that it may end up in another c-section. I'm ok with that. At least I would have tried.
So, now any advise, concerns, suggestions are welcome. I am also trying to find a different doctor. I want one who is more concerned about my wants than his/hers. I want someone who explains my options to me and supports me in what ever decision I make.
Ok, first, YOU and only YOU are in control of your body and your baby. I know it's hard to go against the grain of what friends and family think you should do, but sometimes they don't have all the facts as you do. You do have support. I am here for you and there is an entire online community that has your back. There are doctors (around here) that will do a vbac for you. if nothing else, there are TONS of benefits of actually going into labor. The hormones that are released in labor are so important. Maybe you can not have a 'scheduled' one and just go into labor and go from there? In the end, a healthy baby is all that matters, but I will do everything in my power to help you have the birth you want!
ReplyDeleteI say pray about it and if you have any peace about the VBAC...go for it!!!! I also checked on it with Alahna, but listened to my doctor who said it was not a good idea. I later regretted not at least trying for the VBAC. When I had David I never questioned the doctor about the c-section. Wished later that I would have had more information.
ReplyDeleteI will pray that you find peace about your decision and have the support around you that you will need.
thank you both! If a VBAC is not an option for me then I'm definetly going to be pushing to go into labor before the c-section.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds to me like you mostly need a different doctor. I would even try consulting some midwives and doulas. You need someone who isn't using the c-section as a "one-size-fits-all" option.
ReplyDeleteI would say, find a new Doctor or a midwife. There ARE choices out there, some drs just don't want you to know that bc it's easier for them. I would keep researching and talk to a different dr. God created our bodies to give birth and it is an awesome experience. I'm sure if you pray about it God will lead you in the right direction to the right people.
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