For most of my life I have wanted to be a teacher. I've worked in daycares since I was old enough to work. I've worked in a lot of the daycares in this county and can tell you which ones I would send my kids to and which ones I wouldn't even send a stray dog to. I have known I wanted to teach since I was around 13 years old. I was never really positive what I wanted to teach. At one point I wanted to open my own daycare. When I got into college my major was elementary education. At that point I wanted to teach 2nd grade. Then I had decided I wanted to teach kindergarten or 1st grade. A few years ago I changed my major to early childhood education and decided I wanted to teach preschool-kindergarten. So as you can see the age group has somewhat changed but the career has always been the same.
The past couple months I feel like I'm at a stand still. I'm not at a fork in the road. I feel like there's 50 forks in the road. I have no idea which way I'm suppose to go.
I've been going through my life just knowing I'm going to be a teacher one day. That's what I thought God had planned for me. I was good with that plan. I was happy with it. It suited me. Then one day I woke up and it just came over me....I don't think that's what God wants for me. Something is pulling me out of this "comfort zone" of doing what I know and have always done (teaching). Something is telling me it's not what I'm meant to be doing. I still believe I'm meant to work with kids. I don't think that will ever change.
I have just found myself almost screaming at God "what are you wanting me to do?!?!?!". I wish I knew his plan for me. I want to know where He wants me. Bella and Parker will eventually start school and I will eventually have to leave the house and get a job. LOL I need to be prepared! I can't be Parker's babysitter forever! (although I sure would like to be)
But seriously.....
It's not that I don't think I wouldn't be happy teaching kids. I would be happy working with kids no matter what. I just don't think that is where God wants me. I think He has other plans for me. Some people may not understand that. And that's ok.
I think I am starting to get some direction though. I've been praying and asking for God to show me something. I know He will. I think He has already. I'm just a paranoid person and I like to double check everything 100 times. LOL
So as long as He keeps showing me where He wants me to go, I will keep going. Because I know He's not finished with me!
Enjoyed reading this very much, Barbie. God will reveal His plan for you, as you know. Sometimes the road toward that perfect plan is frustrating. But God's will is worth waiting for and working toward.
ReplyDeleteIt is very encouraging reading your blog this morning. Thanks for sharing. - Joy
Having the courage to step out of our comfort zone and follow God's will into uncharted territory can be very scary. It takes faith and much trust that God will be faithful to see you through. Thankfully we have His Word full of promises and multiple accounts of his faithfulness to His people throughout generations. We can look back through our own lives and see His faithfulness. As long as we are willing to listen and follow, He will lead. He will never follow you. He will never be surprised by what happens in your life. He is always leading the way, lighting your path, preparing the road ahead. He will prepare you for what ever He has planned. No need to worry that He'll call you to something you cannot do. He will always complete the work he begins.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right to keep trusting and keep following. Just remember that as we make this journey of faith to follow Jesus, there are stumbling blocks along the way, and there will be those who will try to make you doubt the way. We have to keep our eyes on Jesus, our sights set on the prize before us. There is hope and joy in following God's ways.
I agree with Joy...it is encouraging to read your post. We never know who we may bless when we share with others our desire to press on and do what is right. As Christians we are called to uplift and encourage each other. You have done just that, simply by sharing your heart.
Much love to you dear Cousin!! Hope to see you soon. I have a great big hug for you!!